Finding the right person to share your life with is like searching the ocean floor until you find a clam that shelters a priceless pearl. It is so prefect that you take it to a jeweler and you place it in a beautiful ring setting so you can show it off to everyone you know. Every time you glance down at the pearl you are inspired by its brilliance and it inflames your heart with love.
This is the reason that it hurts so much when you are betrayed by love. It was as if the pearl that was so valuable fell out of it’s setting and was lost to you forever. But it was worse than that for me, because I was not lost. The person I loved just discarded me, she cut me off without a word and left me bewildered as to why. I believe one reason she tossed me aside was because our relationship would have caused a change that her family would not have liked.
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Depression in teenagers could be provoked by a number of factors, which vary from teenager to teenager. Certain momentous situations may result this disease such as death of someone close, separation of parents, shifting in to a new neighborhood and problems in relations, such as breaking up with lovers.
The Factors That Prompts Depression
Other aspects that could result in depression in the adolescent is lack of attention from the loved ones, cases of being abused or bullied in the past, damage to the morale or rapid and subsequent events occurring. Any major event that causes disturbance to a teenager could trigger depression later.
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Copyright (c) 2008 Elizabeth Davis
While at my master mind meeting last week, we were challenged to share our core compelling story – to reveal the soft underbelly of our business success. What prompted each of us to pursue the path we had and why did we feel the passion we did about our businesses? What was the ONE thing we really DIDN’T want to talk about – because it made us feel vulnerable, exposed, silly, stupid, needy, or just plain weird?
It’s no big secret that I was suicidal in my late teens and again in my late twenties. I even wrote about it in my “How To Read Your Own Hands” study course. However, it’s one thing to write it down – it’s another thing to express it to a live audience of 80+ people.
In my 29th year, I was depressed, deeply depressed. I knew that there had to be more, but what? I was trudging to and from my day job, knowing that there had to be more to life than answering pointless emails, attending pointless meetings and making money just to pay the bills and buy more stuff. A bigger TV was not going to cure the angst and agony chewing a hole through my gut.
I wanted to die not because I hated myself or this beautiful planet; I wanted to die because my life lacked meaning. Although I love the freedom and security money provides, I am not motivated by money. I am motivated by meaning. I was well into my “dark night of the soul.” I was having a spiritual crisis. I may as well as have been dead because I was committing spiritual suicide already – I could not find the POINT, the REASON, the MEANING.
Late one night, in desperation, contemplating the various methods of extinguishing my life available to me, I called a dear friend in hopes she would talk me out of it. (I didn’t really want to die – I just SO BADLY WANTED TO LIVE!) I told her what I was thinking. Her response was not what I expected. “Beth, that is the most selfish thing I’ve ever heard. If you kill yourself, I will chase you from this lifetime into the next. I will never stop hounding you. You need to get outside of yourself and find a purpose to your life. You need to help someone else. Do you really have no idea how loved you are? That makes me sad – that you have no idea how much we need you.”
Her slap upside the head was exactly what I needed. I thought of my mother and the potential guilt she might feel – thinking that perhaps she had done something ‘wrong’ to cause my misery. It was nobody’s fault, there was nothing wrong. I was simply lost. Many spiritual teachers speak of this emptiness as the beginning of true living.
“Well,” I asked my friend, “what should I do?” She said, “How about asking?” “Asking whom?” I said. “Spirit,” she said. “Ask the Universe to show you.” And so I did.
That night, kneeling by the edge of my bed, my knobby knees digging into the floor, I asked: “Great Spirit, God, Goddess, Universe, whatever name you choose to go by, please help me. I beg of you. I am on my knees. I am at my lowest low. If you show me my Life Purpose, I will forever be your humble servant.” I did not realize, at the time, the intensity nor consequences of the prayer I was making.
Two weeks later, a knock came at my door.
(…to be continued in Spiritual Suicide ‘ Part Two.)
Get Beth’s FREE SPECIAL REPORT, “The 5 Massive Mistakes Spiritually-Oriented Women Make in Business (… and how to avoid them!)” and her FREE hot tips to discover your specific career niche at http://www.handanalyst.com Beth won the 2007-2008 Glazer-Kennedy Information Marketer of the Year Award. She’ll show you how your HANDS reveal the best way to market your business message.
Here?s how you can stop yourself from using excuses to kill your momentum using these three simple steps
STEP #1 – SWAT THE MAGGOT
As soon as that excuse starts to wriggle into your mind just splat it BEFORE it turns into a fly and gains its own momentum to take over you. Replace it with a POWERFUL EXCUSE for why you WILL take action towards your goals.
STEP #2 – USE A MIRROR
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Many people head their articles or book chapters with a quote; this lends gravitas, authority and authenticity to what follows. On the whole I like a good quote, although seeing the same quotes and anecdotes repeatedly, (Edison and his light bulbs, Colonel Sanders and his chickens) starts to grate after a while.
With that in mind, here is a quote that changed my life, from “The Book of Five Rings” by Miyamoto Musashi (translated by Thomas Cleary). Have a read and I’ll explain why.
“FIVE KINDS OF GUARD”
“The five kinds of guard are the upper position, middle position, lower position, right-hand guard, and left-hand guard. Although the guard may be divided into five kinds, all of them are for the purpose of killing people. There are no other kinds of guard besides these five.
Whatever guard you adopt, do not think of it as being on guard; think of it as part of the act of killing”.
I found The Book of Five Rings for the handsome sum of fifty pence in Oxfam. At the time I was operations manager for a media firm. I headed 12 managers and 160 staff across three day and night shifts in a business that ran 24/7 and only closed on Christmas Day. Getting everyone moving in the same direction was often a challenge, as we were a feisty bunch, with sizable egos. There were many heated conversations and passionate arguments. I have to admit that sometimes, I would come out of a meeting and feel as though I had taken a right good kicking.?
When we are under attack, people will look for our soft and vulnerable points; they aim at our emotions and our pride. This can knock us off balance and cause us to feel hurt and angry. If our pride is hurt, we may counter attack irrationally and ineffectively and this will make us look even weaker.
Rather than have a weak counter attack it is better to guard and admit that you may not have all the answers, need more time, even acknowledge mistakes, or oversights and apologise. Do not show anger but strive for inward calm, put your ego on hold and demonstrate unwavering equanimity.
Have patience, have perspective, and have perseverance. Not all conflicts are won in a few easy moves. Do not think of it as being on guard; think of it as part of the act of killing. You will persevere. You will win.
The greatest battles are those we fight inside of ourselves, often we need to be on guard. In this case, do not think of it as being on guard; think of it as part of the act of living.
Phil Pearl is a clinical hypnotherapist based in Harley Street, London, W1. He specialises in mental toughness and resilience – helping people to improve their confidence, self-esteem and overcome anxiety and stress. In conjunction with hypnotherapy he uses elements of cognitive behaviour therapy (CBT) and rational emotive behaviour therapy (REBT). He provides training on mental toughness and resilience for companies and organisations. Phil Pearl 10 Harley Street London W1G 9PF Tel 0207 467 8548 email: phil@mental-toughness.co.uk Web: http://www.mental-toughness.co.uk
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